LGBT+ History Month: Listening to the Voices of LGBTQ+ Carers

This LGBT+ History Month, Forward Carers is shining a light on the experiences of LGBTQ+ unpaid Carers – a group whose caring roles are too often unseen, misunderstood, or unsupported.

As part of our long-term commitment to being an inclusive organisation, we recognised that we could do more to understand and support LGBTQ+ Carers. Towards the end of last year, we invited LGBTQ+ Carers and former Carers to share their experiences through a survey and an in-person focus group, kindly hosted by Birmingham LGBT.

Caring can be rewarding, but it can also be exhausting, isolating and emotionally demanding. For LGBTQ+ Carers, these pressures are often compounded by assumptions, a lack of visible inclusion, and uncertainty about whether services are safe spaces to be themselves.

Challenges and assumptions

Our research shows that LGBTQ+ Carers experience many of the same challenges as other unpaid Carers – including fatigue, lack of time, financial stress and social isolation – but with additional barriers linked to identity and confidence in services.

• 55.9% said their sexuality has created challenges in accessing Carer support or services
• 55.9% said their sexuality influences how they see their caring role
• 61.8% said assumptions have been made about their sexuality and their role as a Carer

These assumptions ranged from professionals misidentifying partners or family relationships, to Carers feeling judged, overlooked, or treated differently when seeking help.

One Carer shared:

“A healthcare professional once assumed my mum was my partner because I mentioned we lived together. When I explained I was her son, it created an awkward moment and made me feel like I had to justify my situation more than other carers might.”

Others described feeling treated differently when accessing emotional support:

“When I applied for support, I noticed I was treated differently by the counsellor.”

“At times I’ve felt unsure about being open about my sexuality, because I didn’t know how professionals or support workers would respond. That uncertainty has sometimes made it harder to ask for help or to feel fully understood. In a few situations, I also felt there were assumptions or limited awareness about LGBTQ+ carers, which affected the support I received. It made accessing services more stressful than it should have been and showed how important inclusive, understanding support is for all carers.”

While not always overt discrimination, these experiences accumulate – and can make asking for support feel harder, riskier, and more emotionally draining.

The need for LGBTQ+ Carer spaces

A key finding from the research was the strong appetite for LGBTQ+-specific Carer support groups.

• 73.5% of respondents said they would prefer to access a Carer support group specifically for LGBTQ+ Carers.

Several Carers told us that, in general groups, conversations often assume everyone is heterosexual, making it harder to share openly about their personal life or feeling really understood.

“It wasn’t obvious discrimination, but it left me feeling like I didn’t belong, and over time I stopped going.”

Carers told us that LGBTQ+-specific spaces would offer:

• Safety and freedom to be themselves
• Shared understanding of both caring and LGBTQ+ life
• Less fear of judgement or assumptions
• Stronger peer connections and improved wellbeing

As one Carer put it:

“When a space understands both the caring role and LGBTQ+ identity, it creates real safety and a sense of belonging.”

What happens next

We know that making meaningful, lasting change takes time. We have listened carefully to what LGBTQ+ Carers have told us, and we are committed to responding – thoughtfully, transparently, and in partnership.

As a first step, we would like to launch an LGBTQ+ Carers Group, either online or in person (or both), shaped by the people who will use it.

If you are an LGBTQ+ Carer – or you support someone who is – and would be interested in being involved, please get in touch with bernie.huntingdon@forwardcarers.org.uk

This LGBT+ History Month, we honour the voices of LGBTQ+ Carers. Not just by listening – but by acting.

Some quotes have been lightly edited to protect identity.